About Me

Hi!  Welcome to Surviving Unemployment.

I am Heather, the stay at home mom and wife who has survived 3 years of  her husband’s unemployment.  I am an educated college graduate who feels strongly that I needed to stay home to hold my family together through these difficult years.

Hot Hubbie was one of the first “victims” of the recession, loosing his Finance-related job early March 2008,  (months before the recession was a “recognized recession”).   We have been job hunting ever since.  Hot Hubbie took the opportunity to go back to school and get a MBA.  (We thought that a MBA would help in job prospects, but it has not.  We also thought the recession would have turned around by the time he graduated, it did not)

Throughout our experience during the past 3 years, we have been asked, and asked to share, some of the lessons, tips, tricks, and hints our family has learned about how to handle long-term unemployment.  So, I thought that it was time to start a blog.

I hope that you, no matter your employment status, find something that will help you along your path in life.

Best Wishes!

Oh, and by the way, Hot Hubbie is looking for any job that is Finance related.  His career was in  Public Finance and the Bond Industry, but he is looking for anything finance related now.  (He is sorta a math nerd, you could say 🙂 )    We also stopped caring about the location of the job years ago.  My favorite job locations he has applied for are Brussels, Belgium and London, England.   (We are not limited to the Southwest U.S., where we currently live.)


14 Responses to About Me

  1. brainstormNY says:

    I came across your blog. I just started my own blog http://brainstormny.wordpress.com
    I did because I was recently laid off. i am trying to deal with this. Its though because I have had a job since 15 years of age. Anyways I am interested to follow your blog. I will try to follow once i figure out how.

    • Heather says:

      Thanks for reading it. I am sorry you recently lost your job, but “Welcome” to the unemployment club. 😉 I hope your situations turns around quickly.
      Let me know what you think of my blog or any posts. I love to hear any feedback: what you want more of, less of, or what I haven’t talked about yet. Let me know, I would love to include it.

  2. Can you say where you are and what line of business hubby is looking for? Just in case someone reading can offer a suggestion for support or a lead or a contact.

  3. Dina says:

    hey love your site! I also got laid off and started blogging about it, it’s more of a comedy blog but wanted to pass it along: http://bureaucracyforbreakfast.tumblr.com/

    Take care!

  4. Naomi says:

    Hi Heather, my husband was unemployed for 11 months, and now live on a much lower income than he previously had, so I was excite to find your blog and think what you are doing to help others is just fantastic! We are currently preparing for the birth of our fourth baby in March and would like you to write a guest post on preparing for unexpected job loss to be published during my babymoon. Thank you for considering!

  5. Patty says:

    Hi! Stumbled upon this site, because my hubby and I have been unemployed for a year now and things are just really difficult to handle! My tags just expired on my car and I dont have the $250 to get the windshield replaced. I worked for the Army for 10 years and was part of the “Government budget cut”. I LOVED my job and had great benefits, owned a 4 bedroom house, and had a great life. Now I have lost everything and sit on the floor in a 1bd apartment where my daughters sleep in the living room. It is so hard to keep going day after day not knowing what is going to happen and what to do. How do you mentally make it through all this? I tried renting my house out in order to save it when i realized I was having trouble getting another job, well that backfired and they didnt pay the rent. I always paid my bills on time if not early and paid more than what was actually due, now creditors are calling me telling me I am pathetic because I cant come up with $1500 to pay off a loan. Things have really gotten depressing. Every job i apply for tells me I am overqualified. I thought that was a good thing! I cant even get a call back from a grocery store! My husband is disabled and we have court hearing on 25 july for his ssi/disability approval. If he gets that it will be great, but we live day to day trying to figure out what comes next. Not to mention how hard this adjustment is on teenagers. They werent spoiled by no means but when they needed a bra or something important, I could provide for them. Now I cant and just feel worthless. I have ran out of options on where to come up with money, now I dont have a vehicle if someone calls me for an interview, we have pretty much sold everything, even down to our beds.. Please someone tell me how you survive on unemployment? It is so difficult

    • Heather says:

      Oh, Patty, I am so sorry! I ache for you, and understand how much you hurt. A year ago, at this time, I felt like our unemployment would never end. It had been over 3 years, and we had no hope on the horizon.

      We survived almost 4 years on Faith and Prayers. That is about the only way I know to survive. We had a strong, sure foundation of faith in our lives, in our marriage, and in our family, and we had to rely on that faith to know that there was a Divine Being who had a Divine plan for us, and for some reason, we needed to go through this trial. We had to work hard to see His hand in our lives, and it was up to us to recognize all the help He was giving us to Survive Unemployment. We had many small miracles along the way; anonymous cards in the mail for each of my kids with cash inside for back-to-school supplies, friend and family who would pick up our “date-night” bill [we don’t drink, so we are cheap dates 😉 ], an old car that we prayed for nightly to kept running (I know we were being blessed, because the car died a few months after Hot Hubbie found a job), friends showing up with dinner saying, “I made way too much for my family, so here you go”, “my teenage daughter was cleaning out her closet, do you want to have these clothes?”, etc…I could go on and on. The hard part was making a conscious effort to recognize the Lords hand in our lives.

      Long-term unemployment was the hardest on my Faith. Sometimes I felt so alone. And mad. Our entire lives, and everything we had worked so hard for was gone! I felt like we would NEVER be able to recover from unemployment. Hubbie has had a job for 6 months now, and I am still paranoid that he will come home early, with a box in his arms, saying that he was let go. But in this 6 months we have begun to put our lives back in order. There are still people who are there to love and support us as we struggle to get back on our feet. But it is happening, slowly and surely. I can survive unemployment, and recover from unemployment, and you will be able to too.

      In the end, I know I am a better person having gone through this trial. I care more about others, and I have more empathy for my fellow men. My kids are better people too. They are not part of the “entitlement generation” as so many of their peers are.

      Speaking of my kids, you know, it is funny, for the past 4 summers we have been frequenters of the Library. It was a way to keep the kids busy and entertained on hot dessert summer afternoons. At least that is what my kids thought. I thought is was a poor substitute for all the summer activities we could not afford to give the kids. So when school ended this year, the first thing my kids wanted to do was to go to the library. “It is our summer tradition” they said. And it smacked me in the face, “it is our summer tradition” I thought. All these years, I thought I was depriving them, yet we were just creating new, better, traditions for our family. Going to the library may have been a way to keep the kids entertained for free for the summer, but to the kids, it is what we do.

      Hang in there, Patty. There is a Divine plan for you and your family. You may not be able to see the plan now, but there is one and when this is all over, you will be able to say, “we survived this trial, and we have overcome adversity”.

    • Heather says:

      Patty, do you mind if I make your comment and my reply a separate post? I thought others might benefit from knowing they aren’t the only ones suffering through unemployment.

      • Patty says:

        No I dont mind at all. We are currently living in Arizona and my husband has his SSI/disability appointment before the judge on July 25th. I am praying that it is approved. We had planned on moving back to the east coast to NC where family is, so we aren’t so alone out here, but then we got the paperwork that he has the appointment. I am afraid if we move now, that we wont be able to get that appointment or opportunity back. I thought about going back to school as you said your husband did, but I am scared of the school loans. The last thing I want to do is dig myself into more debt and even though I qualify for financial aid, the school says I will still need a loan to complete a semester of schooling. Not to mention that is not a guarantee I will find a job then either.

  6. Ulrich Drake says:

    I am a financial blogger with in-depth knowledge on core financial topics like Debt, credit, mortgage, insurance, investment and so on. While going through different blogs, I happened to hit upon your blog “www.surviving-unemployment.com” and I loved the structure and the content of the same. I would be highly obliged if you would grant me the permission to write an article for your blog and be an active contributor.

  7. Michelle says:

    Hi Heather, My husband has been unemployed since January. I try everyday to be supportive, but it is very difficult. Everyday I ask him if he found something to apply for, or if a company called about an interview. I want to know about his day, not because I think he is lazy I just want to keep the lines of communication open. Sometimes I think I am doing it all wrong. I work full-time, but my paycheck is not enough to support us. I deferred my student loans for a year, but that ends in December. Every time he goes on an interview I tell him to say he does not need medical coverage and can work for less pay if necessary, he just wants a chance to prove himself. The problem for me is I feel trapped. I cannot look for a better job, because my job pays for our daughters college education, and provides our medical insurance..She is now entering her senior year, and I need to try and find a way to hold on until at least until she graduates. I have applied for part-time jobs, but they want more flexibility in my schedule, and that is not really an option. Sometimes I am just angry, and I am not really sure about what. I don’t know whether to blame a congress who I feel has forsaken the middle-class,the companies who are unwilling to take a chance on hiring a middle-aged man, or my husband for not branching out more. My daughter has a party-time job and does help, but all that does is increase my guilt. I hate feeling like I am mooching off her. Does anyone have suggestions? I would really appreciate the advice.

  8. becca says:

    Don’t feel guilty about your daughter working a part time job, there are loads of young people out there right now wanting a job and struggling to get one not only that but jobs are hard to come by and will teach her about standing on her own two feet and supporting the family unit. When she has her own family she will be grateful from the lessons learned that working has taught her. A lot of women live off their husband’s salary like leeches and decide how the money should be spent, personally I feel as a team we should be doing things to support the husband. I am looking for work right now but constantly getting knocked back is taking it’s toll. I am very academic and am studying again albeit through distance learning due to our circumstances I am hoping this will help the job situation and I just keep trying everyday.
    Your Husband is not lazy in away either and is doing his best to find work, try not to take your anger with societal issues about unemployment out on your man, this will kill your relationship and make your daughter’s life hell. Encourage her about her work and take interest in it. With regards to your Husband he will be going through all sorts of emotions resulting from being unemployed the most important thing you can give him is your love and support. In my experience I’m pretty beaten up about the whole thing, I struggle day to day to not take a knock back personally, the thing is being rejected like that even for a basic (there are loads of people going for the same thing where I live) is psychologically damaging in the long run and how damaging it is depends on the individual. My self esteem is lowering and I get upset easily over trivial things that wouldn’t bother me, I often ask if I am good enough or not or what more could I be doing. I try to get a handle on all this negative energy but the circumstances release it more than I’d like. Someday’s I just feel so down but my husband has done his best to cope with that. He knows how hard I try. In fact that can be the massive dent to one’s ego, trying so hard and getting nowhere. The last time I went to an interview the guy took my cv off me and placed it on the top of a massive pile of other’s that he had and my heart sank. It was a basic job, low salary, as I’ve resorted to applying for anything and everything and I just knew there was no way they would get through all of them for the role they were wanting to fill. Needless to say I did not hear back.
    I wish you and your family all the best on your journey and hope you get peace in your situation. 🙂

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